And, incidentally, personal hygiene – but that’s neither here nor there. Although the Liverputty offices have had no contact with the columnist, himself, we have been in sporadic contact with his Assistant (hapless soul), who is traveling with Finknottle. He assures us that Finknottle is intent on returning at the earliest possible moment, though we are not exactly sure when that might be. In the interim, His Assistance promises to file a report on their status when the opportunity arises. We shall see.
We appreciate his readers’ patience during his absence and only wish that Finknottle was considerate enough to share that appreciation.